The great soda experiment

I walked into the kitchen humming to myself only to stop and do a double take,
"What on Earth are you doing?"

Spock didn't look up from writing in a note book,

"The correct terminology would be 'what on Vulcan' but I will forgive you this time. As to what I am doing....
This time he glanced at me, "Isn't it obvious?"

I looked around;  various drinking glasses were lined in a neat row with containers of soda behind them.

"Having a drinking party?"

He gave me a withering glare, "No."

"Then please," I said sitting down in front of him, "Enlighten me."

"I am so glad you asked."  He grinned mischievously.

"Have you ever noticed that carbonated soda will bubble and overflow?"

I nodded.

"Well, I was wondering if depending on what kind of soda you use, if that would alter the speed and amount at which the carbonation rises. I also wondered if at different heights the carbonated liquid would change.
Will it rise as much if you pour it from a great height verses a low one? How does that change the bubbling content?"

I stared at him, "Are you serious?"

"Yes."

"You're crazy! It's just soda! And I wanted that for my party this weekend!"

"Oh.." he paused, "I'm sorry about that, I'll buy you some more. And why didn't I hear about this party?" He raised an eyebrow.

"Because," I stuttered, "A bunch of girl friends of mine are coming over to...."

He nodded, giving me a knowing glance, "George Clooney, Christopher Reeves or Harrison Ford?"

I felt my face blush at how well he knew me. "None of the above. We're going to watch scary movies instead."

He shrugged, "Don't blame me when you can't sleep at night. Why do you like those things anyway?"

"I don't know... their fun."

"Fear is fun?"

"Augh, I don't know! Would you rather have a bunch of girls screaming in terror or sobbing and giggling over some cute actor?"

He thought for a second, "The first option."

"I thought so."

He went back to doing his 'experiment'.  Taking one of the bottles, he stood up on a chair and began to pour it into a glass.
"What kind of scary movies do you watch anyway? I mean-hold that will you?- they seem ludicrous."

I steadied the glass for him as he carefully poured it in. "Don't you like feeling scared just for fun?"

He gave me a blank look and stepped down from the chair in answer.

He looked at the results of his experiment. "It appears to foam instead of bubble when poured from a greater height. Fascinating."

"You are such a nerd." I said sighing and standing up, "Tell me when you're done."

He waved a hand in response, "Understood."

Two hours later,  I went back into check on him, "You've been awfully quiet, what have you been doing?"

He had cleaned up the kitchen and was sitting in an arm chair looking slightly guilty.

"Nothing."

"I thought you were 'experimenting'."

"I was."

"Well? What happened?"

He sighed, "You seriously didn't hear anything?"

"No...."

"No crashing sounds of any kind?"

I gave him a glare, "What did you do?"

"Did you happen to have any sentimental connections to a certain blue and white glass?"

"You broke it?"

"Possibly."

"And?! Where is it?"

He gave a sheepish grin and walked over to the counter and moved a bowl.  Behind it I saw a  half reassembled glass.
"I'm sorry. I'll try and fix it."

"That's ok."  It was kind of sweet how apologetic he looked, "You really tried to fix it?"

He shrugged.

"Carbonated soda explodes easily. Don't ask about your kitchen towels."

With that he gave one last jaunty grin and left the room.

Role Playing

I was sitting on the couch with my laptop trying to work but kept getting distracted.  Spock was sitting at the dining room table, bent over a book and muttering to himself.

I tried to block it out and focus on writing, but it wasn't working.

"Would you stop that!?"

"Stop what?" he looked up, confused.

"You're talking to yourself!"

"I am not! I am simply reading aloud."

"Can't you do it in your head?"

He sighed, "I will try."

"Thank you." 

Things were quiet for a few minutes and I was happily typing away when he started again.

I gave him my best glare,"Spock you're doing it again!"

He gave me a patient look, one he does when trying not to look annoyed,
"My apologies, reading Latin is not something easily done."

"You read Latin? I thought you were muttering spells."

He smirked. "My knowledge does not lean into witchcraft. The whole 'flying on a broomstick' this is ludicrous."

"Oh really?" I gave him one of my sweetest smiles, "And I always thought you would look so cute in a pointed hat."

He gave me a glare. "You are exasperating."

"You are impossible."

He gave one last look at his book before closing it and coming over to sit across from me.

"You've won my attention, now what do you desire?"

I scooted over for him to sit down, "I didn't want your attention! I wanted you to stop talking to yourself. Hey, that reminds me, why do you talk like that?"

"To what are you referring?" he raised an eyebrow.

"Like that! This isn't the 18th century."

He shrugged, "I do not know."

I sat up, "Let's switch, I'll talk like you and you have to talk like me, ok?"

He nodded, with a rather unsure look.

"Ok," I breathed, sitting up straight and narrowing my eyes,  "My knowledge of Latin is so superior, I make Harry Potter look like a dimwit."

I squinted at him; he was trying really hard not to laugh.

"That was... that was a startling attempt."

"No!" I shouted, "You have to talk- I mean, communicate like me!"

He sighed, then giving an exaggerated eye roll, "That was like, the most awful thing I have like ever seen."

I hit him with the pillow I was holding, "I am not a valley girl!"

He held up a defensive arm to block any further attacks, "Are you sure?"

"Yes I'm sure!" I hit him again, "Take it back!"

"No." He grinned at me.

"Fine." I said scooting away from him, "I'm going to try again, ready? This is going to be good."

He raised an eyebrow, "Thrill me."

I tried giving my best gravely serious look, "Why do they say things are 'homemade'? A home cannot make something."

He pondered this, "Why do they?"

"Arrgh! That's not the point! How did I do?"

He was still thinking the question over, "Hm... I would give you a seven. That is a very interesting point you have brought up, but your facial expression was not accurate."

"How would you know?" I retaliated, "Do you practice in the mirror?"

"No." He grinned at me.

"Uh huh. I believe you. Now what did I do wrong?"

He moved closer, "You have to get this bored look on your face." he demonstrated, making his eyes darken into an intensely bored expression.

"Please don't tell me this is how you feel all the time." I said, trying to mimic him.

He shrugged, "Now you have to look slightly interested," his eyes flickered.

"This is not natural! How am I supposed to do this?"

"Just try. Now, you have to slightly arch your eyebrow."

I tried, but started laughing, "I can't do it!'

"No, that was close, try again."

I pictured all the raised eyebrow looks he'd given me and then tried it.

"Good job!" He looked pleased,  "Except you need to make this part higher."

He reached and with one finger slowly ran it over my eyebrow as I tried arching it higher.

He lowered his hand, "Perfect. You resemble a slightly pained Vulcan. Kudos to you."

I hit him with the pillow again,  "Oh, thank you. Someone in pain is exactly what I want to look like. We can't all practice that look in the mirror."

He gave a mischievous grin.
"You wish."

Mission: Fascinating II

He found it.
I expected a bigger reaction though.... hm. I'll have to try something else.  And why is he still letting me put this on here? Let's just say blackmail is... an appropriate stimulator.
Now, for how he found out:

I was sitting on my dining room table, (Yes, on.) eating a bowl of ice cream and trying really hard not to look guilty. I was staring over Spock's shoulder who happened to be sitting next to me. (Not on the table though, I can't convince him that it's better than a chair)  I was watching him doodle math equations on a paper. At least, it looked like doodling. I'm not sure.
He had said very little all day and I was beginning to have the sneaking suspicion that he knew and was simply waiting for me to crack.

I would never crack! Ever! He'd have to drag it out of me!

Or so my thoughts were when he asked,
"Do you always insist on reading over my shoulder?"

Except, I thought he said something else.

"Ok I did it! I'm sorry! I couldn't help it!"

"Did what?"  he looked confused.  "I know you suffer from that bizarre infatuation with George Clooney, but I honestly don't care if you watched the movies again."

I felt my face turn red. That's a topic we don't talk about.

I laughed nervously. "Hahah, right. The movies...."

He shrugged and went back to doodling. "You really should learn to relax. All that ice cream you eat can't be good for you."

He didn't notice the glare I gave him. He was going to play the innocent, sympathetic card, hoping to get me to confess.

It worked.
.... Sort of.

"So...." I said, trying to change the subject. "Whatcha doing?"

He looked at me like it was obvious. "Mathematical equations."

"Oh." Math wasn't really my thing.

I decided to test the waters and see how much he knew.
"Besides math and all that science junk, do you do any writing?"

"The occasional discourse when the need arises."  he said, scribbling something on the paper.

"Hm..." I nodded. "You don't do like a science journal, or something? Dear Abby columns?"

He put the pen down and gave me a look. "Is there something you want to talk about?"

"No! I mean... I was just wondering."

"You're not a very good liar." 

The one time he was more interested in conversation than math and it had to be about me.

"What do you mean by that?" I tried to play innocent.

"You've turned an interesting shade of red and your eyes look  like their hiding something."

Thank you, Captain obvious.

I decided to play tactful.

"What would you say if someone, hypothetically, wrote something on a certain, hypothetical blog?"

His eyes narrowed, "I would say, hypothetically, that this person better be joking or else they meet a certain  hypothetical doom."

"But what about mercy? Forgive the sinner!"

"So is this the 'sinners' attempt at repentance?" he has the creepy ability to make his voice impassive and sarcastic.

"Possibly. Would you forgive them?"

"Would they apologize first for their legal error of intruding on private property and vow never to do it again?"

He should have been a lawyer.

"Yes.  I- I mean, 'the sinner' apologizes and promises never to do it again. Unless, pressured otherwise under the circumstance of absolute need."

"That's not what I said."

"Well, that's what you get." I stuck my tongue out at him.

"But you can't. I have the password."

"Maybe I changed it." I felt pretty confident with that.

"You know I could mind meld that from you."

Crap.
He made a sudden movement to grab my head and I screamed and jumped off the table, running for the living room.

"Use your powers for good!"

That stopped him. He started laughing really hard.
I wasn't sure if that was another ploy or not, so I stood far away from him.
"You're  not.... mad at me are you?"

He stopped. "Why would I be? It was all merely hypothetical wasn't it?"

"About that...."

Mission: Fascinating

Ha! And he said that he was really working on 'complicated math theories' when in reality it was to be writing a blog to heavens knows who.

Spock, a blog? Really?  I expected something more of you, a scientific journal perhaps.

Yes, the mysterious 'Friend' as I have been so called has accidentally *Cough* stumbled across this blog while searching her friend's room in his absence for her  missing Billy Joel CD. 

And now... perhaps I shall divulge the deepest secrets of this young Vulcan's mind! 
Hm... nah, the fact that he steals my Billy Joel CD is probably shocking enough to the minds of those who have no idea what he's really like.

For example: On our way to some event which I can't remember, he bought my bus fare (I didn't have a car at the time)  when I told him how sweet it was, he simply commented that he had heard such things were said to make girls blush and he wanted to see my reaction for proof.  -So don't believe him if he tries the whole charming gentleman thing.

He probably has you fooled with the whole "Impassive Vulcan" thing too.
Not true. Whenever he goes on one his bizarre science theories, he doesn't sleep for weeks and wanders around the house in his pajamas muttering to himself. And if you ask him a question, he doesn't answer but starts talking animatedly with huge eyes in some type of nerd vernacular about the latest break through he's discovered involving quantum theory and element X. I would call that passive. And don't call him a nerd. It's not nice.

Instead of sharing the... interesting stories I have about him. I will list 12 things that will help you get a better idea of what he's really like.  Be warned, be scared and know that you might never look at him (or me, for that matter) the same way again.

So here we go...

1. It is possible to look amused and grave at the same time. He's quite capable of it.

2. He has a very random fear of roller coasters and refuses to ride one with the excuse that they are not "Logical."

3. He doesn't stop to think before giving one of his profound speeches. You'd think he was quoting the encyclopedia.

4.He hates I mean hates the Brady bunch T.V. show. If you start singing the theme, he glares at you with this look of utter contempt. So don't sing it.  Repeatedly. In different voices. Including Pee Wee Herman's.

5. He reads over my shoulder and has the nerve to tell me to turn the page when he finishes first.

6. He's cute. He just is ok!? There, I said it. And he's an excellent dancer. Think modern Mr. Darcy.

7. He doesn't understand our library's organizational system. I have tried time and time again to explain it to him, but he doesn't get it.

8. You can trick him into watching Chick flicks if you tell him it will unlock valuable information to the female brain.

9. He has a thing for girls with Auburn hair. Like the girl who works at the library.... Oh. Maybe that's why he pretends not to get the system.

10. Don't play poker with him. He cheats.

11. He likes watching the old sci fi movies. 

12. Never, ever watch horror movies with him.  He either guesses the murder and tells you before it's over or sits in bored silence until the end where he explains a much better method of killing the victim. Most of which involve coded messages and lemon juice.

Ok, that's it.  12 things you probably didn't know about him.  I am now going to read what he's written and we will have to see how that goes. Punishment may follow.... If he writes that I punished him horribly by switching out the soy milk carton with normal milk, you should probably believe him. It's been known to happen on occasion.
The look on his face is worth it every time. Believe me.